Fear is actually a great ally. It signals opportunity (unless you’re living out in the wilderness and then it can signal “run”!) But seriously now… fear puts you on notice that you’re at the threshold of realizing more of your potential.
If you step through the threshold despite your fear, you’re likely to never look back because action replaces fear with inspiration. Your creativity and motivation take over and propel you forward.
But you do have to decide… to risk transforming yourself. Without decision, commitment and action it’s not possible to get any closer to what you want. And, indecision out of fear is a joy and creativity killer.
“It’s fear of outcome, not the outcome itself that causes pain.
– Larry Crane, The Release Technique
So here you are… wanting with all your heart to have a financially successful coaching business helping others make decisions and take powerful actions to get what they want. You have important decisions before you. Who is your niche market? What is your message? What offer will be irresistible to them? And, what can you do today to attract more clients and income?
But if you’re paralyzed with fear and need to make a decision now, what do you do?
Five Steps to Move Through Fear and Decide
1. Greet Fear as An Ally.
Everyone feels fear, no matter how confident or capable they are. Fear is inevitable.
So your goal isn’t to stop feeling fear forever, but rather shift to seeing fear as an ally and harbinger of opportunity. Make it a friend, and then the pain of it is fleeting. (And by the way, it will visit you less often too.)
2. Set Aside 5 Minutes to Visit with Fear
Write down the “tapes” that are playing in your head. You might discover a set of assumptions you’re holding that are biased from a past experience. You are not your past.
What is this wise part of you saying to you? What part of your body constricts or tenses up when you feel fear? Ask that part:
What do you need from me right now?
Often, this part just needs reassurance, such as “I can accomplish whatever I set my mind to.” Then your body relaxes and creativity ignites.
Every time I’ve used this coaching technique with a client it’s astounding how quickly their wisdom opens and fear dissolves. Why? Time. You see we rarely take the time to listen to fear as an ally.
3. Let Go of How
When the dreaded hows start flooding your mind, fear amplifies. As Mike Dooley says: “Do all you can, with what you’ve got, from where you are” and the Universe will do its part.
The path to success will always be outside your comfort zone. It’s okay. You know how to grow. You’ve been doing it quite well for a long time.
Let go of the desire to know it all and have it altogether. Lighten up and access your creativity.
Your goal is to make a decision, commit to that decision and take small incremental actions over time. If you require yourself to know how to do everything now, you’ll go numb and get stuck again.
4. Trust that There Are No Wrong Choices
The only poor decision is one made out of fear. If you cannot make the decision now, ask yourself what you need to decide.
Go get it.
5. Set a Date When You’ll Decide No Matter What
On that day if you haven’t made your decision yet, do this guided imagery exercise:
Close your eyes and see yourself filled with light. Then imagine opening your eyes to see a bridge over a beautiful stream. Beyond that bridge is a lovely winding path to your ultimate destination – what you really want.
You can’t see the whole path but it’s calling you on a meaningful journey.
Then you see a basket by the side of the bridge and instantly, you know what to do. One by one you leave your past regrets, your worries, bad habits and limiting beliefs in the basket. With each one you feel lighter and happier.
When you’ve filled the basket, walk halfway across the bridge, let your indecision fall off the side and watch it float away on the stream.
So… let’s hear your tribulations and tips about fear and making decisions. Please post them in the comments below.